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Many people have wondered why I tend to create more abstract works these days. In the following, I want to share my thoughts on the matter with you
What I like the most about abstract works is that there is now right or wrong. If I feel like working with a green, I work with green. If I feel like working with a certain pattern, I work with it. The creation process is more about feelings and composition. The only things I wonder about during the process is "do I want color X in this?" or "do I want a pattern or line in this spot?". No one can judge whether one part of a work is properly executed or not.
In comparison with realistic pencil works (to only name one example), I don't have to find a reference first or have to put long thoughts on how to alter the reference in order to make it my own piece. This actually bothered me a lot in the past couple of years. I do own a camera that takes high quality photos, however, finding photos that made me think "Oh, I want to draw this right now" has become much harder for me. I've usually found inspiration in other people's works, but taking a reference from somebody else (with their permission of course) made me feel like my drawing/painting was never fully my own. Since I loved (and probably still do love) drawing portraits, working without a reference was not working for me.
Furthermore, I was never really satisfied with my works if they did not fully look like the reference. On the one hand I told myself "hey, it doesn't need to look like the reference" but on the other hand I somehow wanted it to look like the reference to prove myself that I had enough skills to copy a photo. I guess I also wanted to show other people what I was able to do with pencils or other media.
What this all adds up to is the fact that the process of creating abstract works is much more enjoyable for me now. I've noticed that I tend to spend a lot more time with art and art creation as well. When I came back home from a long day at University, I never thought "Oh, I really want to draw a realistic 12 hour pencil portrait now". Abstracts and ink works do not take up a long to make, but the process is much more careless for me. I sometimes even take pre-painted watercolor pieces with me to University and then draw on them with ink pens during class, which is so refreshing. Before, I always thought that I needed all my tools and my desk ready in order to create something. Now I just carry watercolor sheets with me and if I feel like drawing, I draw- even if it's on a bus or train. I also have my little watercolor palette with me sometimes. I now paint or draw more for the process than for the product.
This all doesn't mean that I will never draw or paint non-abstract works again though My love for portrait art hasn't dwindled, I just don't feel like drawing/painting them at the moment. I understand if watchers of this page expect more realistic portrait works, it's totally fine. Creating for myself and my own sanity is simply the most important thing for me now. There is no better stress release than to express feelings through arts- and art should make you happy, not worried. I feel like I'm currently in peace with it <3